It will soon be Halloween when the ghosts, goblins and ghouls come out to play, yet for years now football has been haunted by some seriously scary faces of its own. Here are 10 of the scariest, ugliest, most disturbing faces of footballers that have struck fear into the heart of kids and adults alike over the years.

Luke Chadwick

Blessed with pace and every now and then a bit of skill, the former Manchester United winger Luke Chadwick has a face that could easily grace a horror film poster. Now playing for MK Dons – what better club could there be – Chadwick has worked his way down the divisions rather than up, but he’s never lost his looks. When he first broke onto the scene at Old Trafford his looks were as much a topic of discussion as the farcical idea that he might provide competition for David Beckham. It’s pretty clear why and I’m sure most fans are glad when he moves on from their club!

Gabriel Obertan

Obertan is the new Luke Chadwick at United – pacy, occasionally skilful and pig ugly. The Frenchman has more than a look of the Mekon about him with his swelled head, receding hairline and squinty eyes. Signed from Bordeaux in 2009, Obertan provides competition on the wing for the likes of Nani and Valencia – presumably he scares them into playing better, as his talents aren’t a patch on the Portugal and Ecuador internationals. Still, there’s always the Carling Cup for him…

Ronaldinho

The goofy, greasy haired (ok, it’s gel or something, but sort it out, Ronny!) Brazilian is not what you’d call a poster boy for Brazilian football. It’s a good job he is as talented as he is, otherwise he might never have gone on to play – and cheat – in the World Cup. FIFA would surely have been wary of his ugly face ruining their ‘product’. The former World Player of the Year is a hugely skilful player, though, and that is what he will be remembered for. When people say Ronaldinho it’s the football you think of, not the face. Lucky for him!

Peter Crouch

Standing about nine feet tall, built like a pipe cleaner and possessing a face no woman could find attractive, Peter Crouch nevertheless boasts the very good looking Abbey Clancy as his fiance, a baby on the way and even has a string of prostitutes happy to admit they slept with him! The Spurs and England striker is easy to recognise thanks to his remarkable looks and abnormal height and has also commanded huge transfer fees every time he’s moved club. In many ways, he’s a bloody mystery to me!

Carlos Tevez

It might be a little harsh to pick on someone who suffered an accident in his youth that left him scarred, but even if he’d not been that unfortunate Carlos Tevez would still have a face only a mother could love. Quite why he insisted, until recently, to wear his hair in a long, straggly, Stig of the Dump style to add to the mess that is is head I don’t know, but it drew comparisons to the Incredible Hulk and you have to admit, there’s more than a look of Lou Ferrigno about the Manchester City and Argentina striker…

Iain Dowie

The former Southampton striker has long since hung up his boots but that doesn’t mean it’s safe to turn on your television on a Saturday afternoon. Iain Dowie continues to inflict his Neanderthal looks on the world of football as a manager, though he is currently unemployed after successfully getting Hull City relegated last season. The thing about Dowie is that you know he’ll crop up somewhere else some time soon, but you won’t be prepared for seeing that face again! I know he makes me jump when he appears on Sky Sports now and then…

Peter Beardsley

Without doubt, Peter Beardsley is an England great but that doesn’t make him immune to criticism and the most obvious thing to criticise is that face. Beardsley looks as if he’s been made from plasticine by a trouble child and said child has then thrown his creation at the wall in a fit of anger. The Geordie hero suffers from a very bad lisp too, so watching him interviewed is a challenge – not only do you have to look at his face from behind a cushion, your ears struggle to understand a damn word he says.

Alan Brazil

Was Alan Brazil the inspiration behind Mr Potato Head…or was it the other way round? I don’t know, but the resemblance is uncanny. The former Manchester United and Scotland player has the roundest, fattest head I’ve ever seen and his face is just made for radio. Which is lucky, as he currently works for TalkSport as one of their premier presenters. In his youth his curly, frizzy ginger hair only added to his ugliness and emphasised the Potato Head look. Still, I remember him from his United days with affection…and he has a nice smile…

Steve Ogrizovic

I remember watching Coventry play at Manchester City on a cold December afternoon back in the 90s. Poor old Steve Ogrizovic was abused by a bunch of 10 year olds throughout the game for his less than lovely looks. Oh, how I laughed, evil sod that I am. Oggy, as he was known, IS an ugly man though – a kind of Iain Dowie / Luke Chadwick mix in my eyes. He won’t thank me for that, but it really is how I see him and it’s a damn sight kinder than what those kids were yelling at him for 90 minutes.

Peter Reid

It’s been said before but with good reason – if there is such a thing as the Missing Link then we’ve found it in Peter Reid! The man’s resemblance to a monkey is so close you could probably strip him naked, put him in a zoo and market him as a hairless primate. Millions would come to see the attraction – and then promptly leave feeling slightly queasy. Reid doesn’t get better with age either, so it’s good that his TV appearances as a pundit are getting more and more infrequent.

That’s it for our list of ugly footballers. Who have we missed, who really turns your stomach or scares the bejesus out of you? We’re open to suggestion, Sporting Farer’s!